PARKER Associates

“Tell me a stowy, Daddy.”  My father loved to hear me say this when I was a toddler and quoted it to me frequently when I was growing up.   I guess I always liked a good story!  Even now one of the exercises I do with clients looking for meaningful work is to have them write their life stories.  We look for clues of strengths, talents and values that show up throughout their lives.  In those autobiographies are many stories.  Frequently we find one that is the basis for their new career.

Being a good story teller is an important asset for everyone.  It enables you to easily make a memorable point for your audience.  Lately I’ve been thinking about ways to tell a good story especially for people who are not natural story tellers.  Here is a list of 10 steps for you to try.

1. What is your story about? Think of a situation you have faced during your life, a failure, an experience where you were doing meaningful work, an awkward moment, a difficult decision. If you are preparing for an interview think about what the interviewer might ask that you could illustrate with a life or work story.
2. How can you capture the story? Stories are meant to be told so tell the story to someone else i.e. a friend, a coach, or a mentor. If you are alone record your story as you tell it on your recording equipment. It is often easier to tell the story initially than to begin writing immediately. If you are with someone else they will be able to tell you if the story makes sense. Once you have the story recorded you can ask a friend to listen.
3. What is missing in your story? Let your friend, coach, or mentor ask you questions about the story. If you are alone ask yourself some questions about the story. For example ask what was significant about what happened, what was meaningful to you about it, what was the result, why is the story significant and how did you feel? The questions and answers might become part of the story or you might want to work on creating the story in a way that others feel and see what you do.
4.  Why are you telling this story? Look for a point to your story. Don’t make the story fit a point! Let the story tell you what it is about. (In practicing for an interview though as you make a point you may think of a story that illustrates it.)
5. How will you remember the story? It is now time to write down your story. Incorporate all that you have learned from the questions you asked yourself and others asked you into the story.
6. How can you be sure not to bore the audience? Now read the story out loud. Ask others to listen to it too. Eliminate any unnecessary details and leave only what matters to make your audience see the point. Ask for feedback.
7. How can you make the story come alive? Use colorful descriptions, drama and creative tension to make the story more meaningful. Try to get the listener to feel what you felt. If there is a turning point in the story create the tension needed before the final resolution.
8. What is the theme of your story? Find a universal theme for your audience. Here you are giving them the reason for telling them story. It has to do with the point you are making but in fact may be more global.
9. Is your story complete? Write a final draft of your story. Keep editing until you are pleased with the result.
10. How can you make the story seem like a natural part of the conversation? Practice it by reading it over and over until you know it well enough so you can tell it easily in conversational style while still creating the tension and feeling of the story.

Sally (not her real name) arrived early for her appointment.  She was beautifully dressed and made up – not the usual attire for clients coming for business counseling at SCORE.  (I volunteer once a month as part of this organization sponsored by the SBA).  She was in the cosmetic and jewelry sales business so her dress was certainly appropriate for her business.  The moment she entered I was mesmerized by her shoes which had very high heels (4+ inches) with silver straps up to her ankle.  I’d never seen anything like them before.

I smiled at her and said, “I can’t take my eyes off your shoes.  Are they comfortable?  She looked at me and laughed.  “No of course not,” she said and then she added, “I just don’t want to look back years from now and think to myself that I was sorry I didn’t take the opportunity to wear something like this.  They are fun and I enjoy the attention I get when I wear them.”  I had to admit she made a point.

How To Be Memorable

Sally got the counseling she needed in that visit and I did not see her again. About 6 or 7 months later I got a Facebook friend request from someone named Sally.  By this time I had forgotten about our meeting.  I sent back a message saying that I only friend people I had met or had a relationship with and asked her if she could remind me where we met.  She responded that she was a SCORE client.  I see hundreds of SCORE clients in a year and usually only remember the ones that come back for repeated visits.

When she mentioned SCORE though I immediately thought of the Sally with the silver shoes and asked her if she was the person with the wonderful shoes.  She was amused by the way I remembered her and pleased that I accepted her friend invitation

What makes you memorable?  If you are job seeker you need to be memorable to the interviewer.  It is that uniqueness, that special something that makes someone say, “You remember her, she was the one who had those amazing shoes.” And because the shoes stood out , you do remember her.

Tell Your Story

In business you want to be memorable in a way that is connected to your business.  Sally was in the fashion business so interesting shoes were appropriate to what she was doing.  They may not be for you.

Another way to be memorable is to have a story that is memorable.  Chances are you will remember my shoe story.  Your story might be about how you got to where you are today, something exciting that happened to you, or an important success in your life or business.  Whatever your story is it should make the point you wish to make with the person to whom you are telling the story.

Stories are becoming more and more necessary in whatever you do.   Accomplishment stories help make your accomplishments memorable to an interviewer.  Stories entertain, explain and sell.  What are your stories and how do you use them?

A Story Telling Tool

Need some help crafting your story?  In an Improv class the instructor gave us a little outline of how an interesting  story might flow.  Here it is:

1. Once upon a time (Set the stage)
2. And Every Day(month, year) or alternatively It was his/her practice
3. Until One Day
4. Because of that
5. Because of that
6. Until finally
7. And so now (What did I learn?)

Now here is my story following that pattern:

Once upon a time there was a woman named Sally who had a growing cosmetic and Jewelry business.
It was her practice to wear very stylish clothes and shoes.  

One Day she came to SCORE for business counseling wearing Silver shoes with very high heels (4+ inches high). 

Because of that I could not take my eyes off her shoes.  They were amazing!  When I asked her if the shoes were comfortable she laughed and said they were not but she did not want to grow old without experiencing something so fashion forward, different and interesting.

Because of that 6 or 7 months later Sally invited me to be her friend on Facebook.  I wasn’t sure I knew her and so I did not immediately accept her invitation.

Until finally she mentioned SCORE .  Then I remembered Sally and her shoes

And so now I realize that if I want to be memorable I need to wear or do something really different to stand out from the crowd.

So if you want to be memorable when you speak to a group, when you go for an interview, and when you network think about the stories you have to tell and develop them in an interesting way to build interest and make your point.  The format above is one way to do it.  What are some others that you use?